Healthy Relationships Part Two

Until Christ arrived and changed things Jews were considered the people of God while Gentiles were dogs, they were pagans, rejected people as it pertained to God. This led to an attitude of competition and jealousy that reared it’s ugly head even in the church.

This attitude of superiority is what fueled the Judaizers and corrupted the faith of many a Gentile believer by bringing them into works righteousness and away from true faith.  All because someone played the superiority card which will tend to fuel envy and jealousy. It will draw people into error and it can divide relationships.

The fact is there are no elite people in the Kingdom, all are equal in God's sight through Christ.  We are either in Him or we are not.  Being Jewish will not make anyone any more important than another and there is no greater spirituality to be gained by it.  Nor will being rich elevate someone to a place of prominence in the Father's courts.  It has nothing to do with your human birth right, social status, gender or race.  It has to do with Christ.

Elitism spawned through misunderstanding the work of Christ causes divisions, it did so in the eraly church.  What was the fix?

Ephesians 2:9 Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. 10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. 11 ¶ Don’t forget that you Gentiles used to be outsiders. You were called “uncircumcised heathens’’ by the Jews, who were proud of their circumcision, even though it affected only their bodies and not their hearts. 12 In those days you were living apart from Christ. You were excluded from citizenship among the people of Israel, and you did not know the covenant promises God had made to them. You lived in this world without God and without hope. 13 But now you have been united with Christ Jesus. Once you were far away from God, but now you have been brought near to him through the blood of Christ. 14 ¶ For Christ himself has brought peace to us. He united Jews and Gentiles into one people when, in his own body on the cross, he broke down the wall of hostility that separated us. 15 He did this by ending the system of law with its commandments and regulations. He made peace between Jews and Gentiles by creating in himself one new people from the two groups. 16 Together as one body, Christ reconciled both groups to God by means of his death on the cross, and our hostility toward each other was put to death. 17 He brought this Good News of peace to you Gentiles who were far away from him, and peace to the Jews who were near. 18 Now all of us can come to the Father through the same Holy Spirit because of what Christ has done for us. 19 So now you Gentiles are no longer strangers and foreigners. You are citizens along with all of God’s holy people. You are members of God’s family. 20 Together, we are his house, built on the foundation of the apostles and the prophets. And the cornerstone is Christ Jesus himself. 21 We are carefully joined together in him, becoming a holy temple for the Lord.

God has only one way to correct dysfunctional relationships and that is through the cross. The cross is the place where I die to myself and come to grips with what God says about me, my situation, and the others involved. It is God’s means of bringing death to self so Christ might be seen in me.

Healthy Relationships Part One

The more time I spend in Scripture the more convinced I become of how important relationships are to God.  But relationships are not just important to God, they are important to us as human beings. From the beginning of time man has had a need to have relationship even when he had sweet fellowship with God himself.

We were created to engage in relationship with others.

Adam walked in the cool of the garden with God, he enjoyed wide open fellowship with his creator. But as he named the animals he noticed they came in pairs. Each male had a companion.  This must have registered in Adam’s heart. God knew Adam needed help so he caused a deep sleep to come upon him and he made a woman for Adam from Adam’s rib.

Adam knew he needed relationship in this life with another human being.

We are all in the same condition as Adam. We are created to have relationship.  Some happen to be better at it than others.

One thing is for certain ever since Adam sinned relationship dysfunction has been a reality.

Sin caused Adam to blame Eve. The person he longed for, and loved to the point of sacrifing for he later blamed. This is true because sin brings dysfunction into any relationship.  Think about it.  Adam was willing to wilfully partake of the fruit knowing it was forbidden because of his desire for Eve.  But after it was accomplished and sin was conceived Adam was trying to put the blam on her.

Sin devalues relationship. The absence of valuing relationships and the inability to give honor to whom honor is due is a reflection of decay and weakness, not strength.

It is a common place practice in the world, but did you know Christians struggle with this as well?

James 4:1 What is causing the quarrels and fights among you? Don’t they come from the evil desires at war within you? 2 You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it. 3 And even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong —you want only what will give you pleasure.

It is possible to be born again and still be engaged in dysfunctional relationships all around you.  Believers can continue to be carnal.

Jealousy and envy are still alive and well in humanity and the church is made up of redeemed human beings. If we stray from holding the Lord as precious and seeing Christ we can begin live only for ourselves. This leads people to jealousy and envy of others as opposed to wanting the best for others.

In families sometimes siblings will become jealous of one another based on what they think might be favoritism being shown to a particular member.

The age old wanting what belongs to someone else has been a plague for all human history. Cain killed Able out of jealousy. Josephs brothers sold him into slavery to get rid of him. The disciples argued over who would be the greatest as they walked along the road with Jesus.

This competition for prestige or prominence has been the ruin of many relationships throughout history.  Sin has damaged relationship with God and with others.  Only through Christ can we truly engage in healthy relationship again.